Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Things that might help if your considering adoption...

I have thought about how I would feel if I were a birth mother (trying to put myself in your shoes) I think I would be over whelmed so I put some information together in hopes that it helps some how.

1. Make a list:
Write out what you want first, because what you want matters!
Question to ask yourself: WHAT DO I WANT FOR THIS CHILD? ( a childless couple, a family with one or two siblings, your child to be the oldest or the youngest child, a large family….. a stay at home mother, people who have religion in their life, etc….)

2.Things to know: Choosing to meet a family or couple does NOT OBLIGATE YOU to place with them!!!! It is just a meeting :)
If you’re having trouble with finding what you want from that list you made, ask for help from a case worker from the agency of your choice. THEY WILL HELP YOU FIND SOMEONE


To find an adoption agency locally you can do a Google search for your state and adoption agencies or the yellow pages. Most that you come upon will say: Are you pregnant? on it somewhere with directions and buttons to click. Here are some common agencies that I found from the list of my hopeful adoptive couples and with some looking on the internet.

Christian Family Services of Colorado, Inc.
Website: http://www.cfs-adoptions.org/
A Non-Profit Child Placement Agency ( I could not find profiles viewable to just anyone. You do have to contact these people first but it’s an option.)

Website: https://www.itsaboutlove.org/ial/ct/eng/site/pregnant/
Click on view adopting family profiles
Click on guests continue (button)
You can then select any to view profiles but I suggest…. Search by keywords
(This will allow you to pick details closer to your list of what you want) then press search after making your selections
At LDS Family Services you will see a picture and then a little something the hopeful adoptive couple wrote to catch your eye or to connect with you. These are called Profile teasers and we (hopeful adoptive couples) are told to write something that will help us stand out from others and maybe draw you in to who we are. (Hope that helped)

website: http://www.adoption.com/
Click on Pregnant
Under that click on Parent Profiles and it will bring up hopeful couples to look at.

website: http://www.myadoptionprofile.com/
It’s all on the first page, pictures and families to view

Parent Profiles
website: http://www.parentprofiles.com/
Click pregnancy and adoption link
Then you click on one of these.
View Profiles
Search Profiles
• Browse All Profiles

Idaho Youth Ranch
website: http://idahoyouthranchadoptions.org/
I could not find viewable family profiles but there is info on how to reach them if that is who you want to go through.

Independent Adoption Center at 1-800-877-OPEN (6736)
website: www.adoptionhelp.org/birthmother.html
Click on Choose a family and then off to the side you can either view all profile or click on my preferences and fill in your specifications on what you want.

Adoption Network Law Center
website: http://www.adoptionnetwork.com/adoption.shtml
Click on find a family
Then pick one of the options that will show you either region, religion, a more advanced search, ethnicity or random pick.

Heart to Heart Adoption Inc.
I could not find a place to view profiles there but they seem to have info if you’re interested in choosing their agency.

website: http://www.spence-chapin.org/unplanned-pregnancy/a0_unplanned_pregnancy.php
Click on waiting families under If Your Pregnant. The next page is full of waiting families to view.

American Adoptions
website: http://www.americanadoptions.com/family_profile/browse
You can see profiles right away when you go to this website and there is an option for searching by state, ethnicity, children already in the family and an advance search.

I Heart Adoption
website: http://www.iheartadoption.org/
Click on find a family and put in what you want to search for.

4.Blogs: Many blogs that are advocates of adoption in some form will most likely have a list of hopeful adoptive couples, like this one. It is a good place to start, not so over whelming and the list is usually smaller.

5. Family /Friends: Word of mouth is usually one of the best ways. Be prepared, as a Birth Mom, you will most likely get tired of people sharing someone with you that they know who is hoping to adopt. (a suggestion) I think prayer can help guide you in which direction to go.

6. Leaders of your church or faith: Go to your Clergy: sometimes these kinds of people with leadership positions over congregations of people, know of couples hoping to adopt and can testify to what kind of people they are. If you are of a particular faith, and want your child to be of that same faith, this could be a good resource.

7.A Forum:
Adoption Voices website: http://adoptionvoices.com/
This is a forum that would provide you with a look at hopeful adoptive couples. There are many topics on it for support and help. (My suggestion would be to NOT let people know you’re looking for a family) Just be an observer, there are many families on this site and you can read daily things they write, see how they interact with people and maybe get a sense of their true character. It’s a thought anyhow ;)

8. Dave Williams says :The agency i work for is the adoption center of choice in Orem Utah. We have been helping birth moms for 1 years and have placed over 1100 newborns. We have averaged close to 100 placements a year for several years. We have a great BM program. We have a Utah program and an out of state program. For those who need a safe and secure environment during their pregnancy we will bring them to our Utah program. For those that are in a good place at home we will help them there.

Some of the features of the Utah BM program are:

We will bring them to Utah free of charge We will send them back home free of charge Each BM gets a two bedroom apt of her own while she awaits the birth Each apt has cable TV, Internet and phone service Each has a kitchen and laundry facilities We provide weekly financial assistance We have a fleet of vans so we can shuttle our BM to the Doctor, shopping, anywhere they want to go Tuesday is our "Doctor" day. Where each BM is taken for pre-natal care Our BM's deliver in a very nice hospital We have on-site child care for any BM who may bring little one with her We have house parents who live on premise to take care of our BM needs Each BM has a case worker/advocate to help her Our BM have individual and group counseling opportunities Twice a week they are offered "Activity Days" with other BM in our program.

It's a great program and our BM's really appreciate the care they are given. For out of state BM's we try to offer as much of this program to them as we can.

If you have any BM's who we can help give me a call at 801-473-9350

I really hope that some of that information helped and was insightful. As I collect more I will add to this post. This is what I have on my blog and I believe this to be true....

"Out of all the wonderful families in the world, there is one family meant for the child that you carry, there is HOPE! It is our prayer that you find that one family, we wish you the best in your journey!"


  1. Karine, I completely agree with advice about Adoption Voices. If a woman puts that she's considering adoption, she's pounced upon by people hoping to adopt and network (I've seen it happen so many times, and I admit that I've been guilty of doing the same thing). Anyway, I love what you're doing.

  2. Can I be super obnoxious here? A woman isn't a birth mother until she's placed a child for adoption. Before that, she's a woman with an adoption plan, or a woman with an unplanned pregnancy, or whatever else. I know that being referred to as a birth mom when I was considering adoption put a lot of pressure on me, and it was tough. It made me feel more like a vessel and less like a person. Obviously, now that I've placed I refer to myself as a birth mom, but before I'd chosen a family, being called a birth mom just cheesed me off. Just something to consider. And even I think I'm obnoxious for pointing all this out, so sorry for that, I'm done now.

    Okay, obnoxiousness done. I love your list! Your adoption agency list in particular is well done; I may steal it in the future. Thank you for being such a loving advocate of birth moms!

  3. Jill,
    thank you for sharing that I am still learning. I do not want to do cause pressure. I will change my title. THANK YOU! I actually like feed back. I want to always show love and respect towards all women considering to place and birth mothers. Thank you again.
    Please forgive me of my ignorance to all those who might be upset. I really am trying to do it right :) Please be patient with me :)